For my third essay I really want to make sure my argument is strong and easy to follow. I want the reader to be able to relate to my opinions and to see the direction I want the paper to go in. I want to reorganize my paper a bit so my ideas make more sense. I originally thought to add some more examples but instead I think I want to focus on the one’s I already have and see if I can add more to them based on the prompt. I think my paper has some good parts but it just needs to be built up more in order for it to be a final paper. I need to work on clearly stating my opinion and not dancing around it, I have to be more direct about my claims. I think if I read over it a few more times and find what I think needs fixing along with using my peers advice I will have a strong final draft.
Month: November 2018
My Article is called “Beauty is in the Brain of the Beholder” and is by Ed Yong. My article talks about the how feelings of beauty are manifested in the brain. It centers around neuroscience and evolves into more of a conversation regarding how a scientist looks at art and beauty. It includes how philosophy is included in interpreting beauty. the article notes that the brain can see different forms of beauty in different ways. It notes how both auditory and visual senses play a key role in how a viewer sees beauty. The article uses a painting as an example to explain the theory.
I feel this article will be good to include in my paper because it gives a different perspective on how beauty is interpreted. I can compare and contrast this article with Armstrong’s argument to help get my thesis across. I think my paper is going to center around the importance of perception and interpretation as it relates to beauty and how each individual can have a different interpretation and then I will relate the individual perception to society on a larger scale.
I am going to use my podcast within my paper because I feel the person I interviewed talked about how beauty is in the eye of the beholder and how each person should find their artistic path. I am also going to use Alex and Terry’s podcast because their subject talked about how beauty is related to the self-defintion and once you are content with yourself then you are beautiful and will see beauty. I think this will be good to use within my paper because the podcast talks a lot about interpretation and and that is what I want my paper to focus on.
La Bella Vita Quote
“To regard beauty as a luxury adornment or a social signifier was to miss the true potential of the experience.”
The statement above is true in my opinion. My community, meaning most of my peers view beauty as something that needs to be displayed. Most people are becoming more and more concerned over social media and what it means to be beautiful. Girls post pictures that are edited to make themselves look “better” in order to get more followers and become popular. To me this is stupid. Just be who you are. It shouldn’t matter what anyone thinks you should be happy with your appearance not change it in a picture to what you think the public deems as acceptable. Body shaming has become a problem that needs to be addressed. No one should feel uncomfortable in their body but unfortunately some due based on society standards. Beauty to mean should not be based on appearance but what is on the inside. Beauty is viewed as a social signifier relating to popularity but it shouldn’t be. Beauty should be considered within art and literature as well as character. If you have a kind beautiful soul then you are beautiful. Beauty is not a luxury in my opinion. Beauty is something to experience and enjoy. To look at something beautiful or to be beautiful yourself is what the true potential of what beauty is.
In “They Say I Say” I read a chapter on introduction paragraphs. My main goal of the revision process is to come out with a stronger thesis. To develop a strong thesis you need your introduction paragraph to flow into it. I need to remember to not write the paper in the standard five paragraph format. I have more freedom in this academic essay to really state my opinion. To do this I need to incorporate more background and my own thoughts into my introduction so I can build off them later. After my conference I received helpful information to make a stronger argument that has a better connection to me. My introduction was weak at first now I have a plan to make it stronger.“They Say I say” helps and can be used as helpful hints when you are stuck on how to improve your paper.
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